Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Coming off meds...

Ok, so here's the way it works: you get to the point where you're feeling stable, so you decide to come off the meds.

But this has to be done very slowly - this time, it will take me about a month to come off them, as you have to decrease the dosage slowly, or your body freaks out completely.

So during this month of lowering the dosage, my brain goes WHATS GOING ON?!!! and is generally confused, as it's serotonin levels are changing. So Rachel feels really strange, tired, sick, clumsy, weepy, etc while her brain adjusts to all this. So the feeling of 'ah, I'm so stable and don't feel at all crazy so it's time to come off the meds' is temporarily replaced by the feelings I've just mentioned.

So I need to remind myself that I am feeling better, cos for the next few weeks, I won't feel like it. But then it's worth it for that great feeling when I'm completely off the meds. Until next time.

You know it's a great encouragement that God never changes, that He's the same yesterday, today and forever - He is my firm foundation through all the storms of life :)

Here's a blast from my past - a poem I wrote when I first went crazy that got into an art exhibition called "Art works in mental health" 2003 - see page 2, Chloe Stranam (that's me, rearranged!).

2 comments:

Gareth said...

Wow Rach that's an awesome poem. I am very impressed, although at the same time I realise that it came out of a horrible time and so maybe impressed isn't the right word... still it's very talented!

Anonymous said...

Rach, that poem was great! Your a talented person.

Hope things are getting better,
I just prayed for you and hope to do it again. We have an awesome God!